In remembrance of my hair. I suddenly remembered this picture of me about a year ago before I destroyed my hair. Now I have it sitting right below my shoulders, strawed out up in a bun. I’m the only one to blame and all I hear is my daughter saying “no mom don’t do it again” as I stared at her in the eyes and picked up the bleach and applied to the death of my hair, though I had told her months ago after I had destroyed it the time before, to not let me do it if she were to see me doing this again. I don’t know what’s going to stop me. Please stop me.
I would’ve had the longest beautifulest hair right now, shiny, non-destroyed, non-harsh. I know better. I got my hair license back in 99’. I know better. But here I am with sandals on, leggings, long, pink t-shirt and a tiny rugged bun up, of what’s left of my stringy hair flailing all around.
Anyways. Just a thought for today. We need to break these old habits and I don’t know what it’s going to take, but I do know what I have done in the past, is just dumped it. Dumped what? Well, for example, I’ve had a few boxes for years full of papers that I have needed to sort out, and the other day I took one of the boxes out of the closet and I was about to give up from the frustration of the sorting getting too confusing of where to put everything or what to throw out. I decided to put it back into the closet. I grabbed the box. I suddenly did the opposite of what I had just decided, so I turned the box and just flipped it and threw everything out unto the floor. Me and my three kids sorted that whole box. I’m proud to announce I’m down to two boxes! Celebrate. Celebrate. By the way, I hate clutter in cabinets and drawers. I hate junk drawers. And yet I’ve had these six boxes full of paper following me everywhere through the years. I mean I don’t know if there were six, maybe seven, sometimes I’d go down to four, sometimes theyr’d be eight, but right now I have two.
I think that’s what it takes just to suddenly go the opposite way of what we’re used to doing, right in the middle when we are about to do the same thing over again. Just dump it. I should’ve just dumped that hair coloring brush out of my hand. Next time I’ll just tell my daughter to rip that brush of my hand and slap me in the face with it. Knock me out, you know.
